"I wanna shell out $50 for the next part of the FFVII remake" I said, fully believing the lie was telling myself.

Anyway.

I picked up FFVII Rebirth on Sunday and I basically haven't put it down since XD It's so much better than Remake it's honestly incredible; they very clearly took feedback into consideration with this one. The gameplay is tightened up and modified just enough that it's fun instead of clunky, and while I still prefer the traditional turn-based experience, this is massive improvement over the last one. I still think Crisis Core feels a bit smoother because it leans more into the hack and slash nature of it, but I'm not dying in every fucking fight like I did in Remake.

ALSO THE FEW SECONDS OF ZACK IN THE OPENING IN AN ALTERNATE(??????) TIMELINE GOT ME RIGHT IN THE FEELS. I think because I just finished playing Crisis Core it hit particularly hard, but holy shitttttt, I was about ready to cry ;w;

Cloud looks so good too, like...they really have nailed "anime spiky hair bullshit" mixed with realism...it looks so soft and fluffy and also well spiked. It's just. idk. It manages to nail a lot of the stylistic things that fell short in Kingdom Hearts 3, and while I'm delighted it did...it also makes me sad for what could have been in KH3. It was ALSO an amazing game, but I'm still fussy about the style changes between KH3 and literally every other KH game ever :T

MOVING ON!!!

For the first time in a long time, I feel like I'm playing a game that was made for the PS5. Besides Ratchet & Clank: Rift Apart, everything else I own for the PS5 is on at least one other system (usually a fair amount), because everything is made for every damn system now!!!! It makes it feel like.....why do I have this system if it's just like everything else on the market?

BUT NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FFVII REBIRTH FEELS LIKE IT'S USING THE FULL CAPABILITIES OF THE SYSTEM!!!!!!! And not just like, oh the graphics are fancy, isn't that enough? No!!! There are so many little details that pull it all together and make it a richer experience *w*

I have a lot of other thoughts about it, but tbh I just wanna go back to playing....


so here's a majestic picture of Cloud with a dolphin XD

( few more screencaps under here! )

OH ALSO!!!! We had to go out to get more food for Lumos, because she's currently on "only the fanciest food money can buy" for her sensitive tummy...which is definitely hitting us where it hurts (the wallet). But we also picked up some groceries, including this absolutely necessary ceramic figure of a balloon animal. What animal? I have no idea, but I love him ♥


I put him on top of the TV with my son who has every disease (the green pumpkin)
BACK TO MORE FFVII I have a mini game I actually like (rhythm game)~

First thing: Lumos is doing better!!! She's been eating more regularly today and we got her some new antibiotics...which she does not like, but she didn't throw them up. So I'm counting that as a win ♥

Now, let's catch up on the rest of my life, since the last few days with Lumos kinda drove everything else out of mind. I finished playing Crisis Core a couple nights ago and basically cried like a baby. Every fucking time I'm like "maybe this time it'll be different" even though I know it won't be. The nature of a prologue like this is to let the tragedy loom in the distance while every bit of the game fills you with such hope that you can't help but get swept up in it. But that's just it- Zack has to die so Cloud can become the protagonist, and it's so damn good ;w;

Seriously...I have only hazy memories of playing the original on the PSP back in high school. I mostly remember GACKT Genesis pulling a whole bunch of anime bullshit at the end, so I somehow forgot the incredible bit of plot integrating into the UI in the final fight. Holy shit it was good. That's the sort of thing that I love about video games; when the menus suddenly become key plot elements I lose it!!!! :D

Anyway, I now desperately wanna pick up the next part of the FFVII remake (despite not really liking the first one), but I don't wanna shell out $50 for it especially with how much everything with Lumos just cost sobs so...I'm replaying the original XD tbh I wanted the next part so I could finally get out of fucking Midgar and I didn't wanna replay the original because, well, Midgar. But I had a save file on the PS3 that's right before the final couple boss fights in Midgar, so I called that close enough and started playing it this evening.

AND I DISCOVERED SOMETHING:


YOU CAN CHANGE THE COLOR OF THE MENUS??????????????????
Literally I first played FFVII in 2004 and I somehow never realized this until today. Okay. I'm stupid XD This picture doesn't quite capture how pretty my color gradient is, but the PS3 doesn't natively take screencaps and I didn't feel running it through the capture card. Maybe another day~

In enstars news: I got both 5* cards from the jp tour last night!!!! I actually have enough whistles and event bonus that I can probably nab a second copy of each pretty easily, because apparently that's just what I do with year end tours in jp?? XD Whatever, I'm not complaining...I'm delighted to have more Rei and Tori cards.

Aaaaand a couple doujins + a small piece of merch came in the mail! Probably the next package from our jp shopping service will be the exciting one - new outfits for the nuis!! - but this one was still good :D

( more pics + enstars screencaps )

Anyway, I started a new community this week as well, because what good is stress if you don't turn it into making sparkle graphics? XD I'd been hoping for a freebie community to pop up on a DW because I didn't feel like I should be the one running it...for some deranged reason???? I ran a bunch of freebie communities on GJ back in the day, idk why I thought I wasn't qualified??? But talking with thewizardofoz about it the other day pushed me to ignore my nerves and just go for it!

SO!!! Now vogliaa exists, which is the name of one I ran on GJ. I held onto a bunch of old icons I used to use to post there + I managed to lift the profile from the wayback machine, so I had something to start with. The banners and layout coding are all brand new, tho the layout coding comes from someone who was very big during 00s-era of freebies/requestables. I think it looks very nostalgic and colorful and nice ♥

Everyone has been so nice about it so far btw ;w; I've gotten some really kind comments and it just reminds me of how much I love making icons, honestly. I know that it's a bit rose-tinted, but making requestables on GJ was such a formative part of my life...I know I wouldn't be who I am today if not for the community and friends I made there.

ALSO THE TEMPERATURE JUMPED TODAY FOR NO FUCKING REASON BLUH

tl;dr: she was doing a lot better when we left the vet and now is doing less so D:

Her x-rays came back fairly clear, other than the fact that she's been swallowing air- probably because of how congested she's been ;w; She's been gulping air while trying to breathe and now she's full of air + gas. They gave her an injection to take down inflammation and get rid of nausea. And holy shit did that work wonders! Within half an hour, she was breathing much more quietly, was more relaxed, and just in general seemed to be doing better. Yay!

They sent us home with the pill form of the injection they gave her + an antibiotic, with instructions to call next week to see how things are doing. Pat and I got Wawa and then I fed Lumos treats in the parking lot, and she finally ate something!!!!! So we were feeling a lot better. She even ate most of a package of her wet food when we got home :D

Pat had a queer speed dating thing tonight, so it was set to be a nice, chill evening in for me and Liz...which it was! At first!!! Until we realized that Lumos was getting louder again D: But also it was late enough to try to get her to eat another meal.....which she was not interested in at all.

Okay. Well, she has to take her antibiotics without food, so let's do those?

NOPE! It was a liquid antibiotic and she threw it up almost immediately ;w; She's continued to breathe very loudly ever since, though thankfully in the last 15-ish minutes her breathing has started to calm down again. She still has no interest in food or drink, though.

Please everyone keep her in your thoughts ;w; I'm still not over Ethyl passing in 2023- I cannot handle anything going wrong with Lumos right now. I'll just die ;w;

Soooo Pat and I are currently at the vet with Lumos, and she did NOT like the trip here. Usually she's more chill on car rides, but today she was stressed out the whole time. She kept opening her mouth and panting, which I think was from stress, but it's making me stressed ;w;

Her chipped tooth just barely exposed some of the nerve inside, but since her breathing is so bad they're gonna focus on that, since they'd have to put her under for dental work and they don't wanna do that while she's wheezing so much. ESPECIALLY since she decided she didn't want to eat today, which is worrying. Usually she'll eat her fancy slop wet food if nothing else. NOT TODAY THOUGH D:

Anyway. She's off getting xrays, so hopefully I'll have more answers soon ;w; They're real worried about her chest with how wheezy she is.

edit: back from xrays, looking cute! now we're just waiting for results.

Lumos chipped one of her teeth D: She'd already been feeling under the weather - we think she's developed seasonal allergies in her old age - but tonight I managed to catch a glimpse of her yawning and noticed something looked off. Thankfully she's a calm and trusting cat, so I was able to hold her head and gently pull her lips back to get a better look...and yep! One of her front fangies is chipped ;w;

So, uh, we're getting her to the vet ASAP. Liz is gonna call first thing tomorrow morning and see if we can get in same day (or maybe the next day), because tooth stuff is no joke. I'm really hoping it's nothing major...everyone please keep Lumos in your thoughts ;w; She's 12 now, so she isn't young, but she's still so vibrant and energetic usually.

Right now she's sleeping very peacefully, because she got her fancy wet food all day. She's been refusing to eat kibbles and now we know why D: So! Since she's allergic to one of the additives in most wet foods, we can only get her the ~grain free, filler free, all pure ingredients~ foods. We'd been getting her a salmon & pumpkin mousse that's specifically formulated for older cats, but they came out with new flavors recently! And I figured she could use some variety, and I was right, because she loved the tuna, mackerel, and pumpkin one we got this time.

She's so spoiled I love her so much ♥

uhhhhhhhhhhhh my brain is mush because I've been in the enstars mines all day (playing the jp tour) but I have many thoughts about the whole two (2) chapters of story I read XD I usually read the whole thing at once, but I couldn't help but jump ahead to the bit that's Crazy:B + Madara because...okay, because I'm a simple man, I'm always hoping for kohamada crumbs.


the boys were also here for Kohaku + Madara interactions, clearly
AND IT FUCKING DELIVERED!!!!!!! Yeah, it was only two chapters, but they had a ton of back and forth, cute snarky bits, etc etc etc ;w; Rinne now has a nickname for Madara - Mikeneko-chan - and it's so fucking cute!!! I'm so glad someone finally called him a calico cat in text, it's important to me *w* And then Niki said that Kohaku and Madara looked like cats together, which was so fucking precious. Like. Yes, please compare my faves to kitty cats, my day is made.

ALSO!!!!!!! Rinne told Madara that he has to prove his worth before he can have Kohaku back - which for the record isn't even why Madara was there, he just showed up and that was the first thing Rinne said to him XD - and it very much had the vibe of "you broke my friend's heart and I'm not gonna let you do it again" so like. VERY GOOD SHIP CRUMBS FOR MEEEEEEEE. This was followed by Kohaku being like "I can do whatever I want" which, again, gay????? SO GOOD.

HiMERU very clearly did not like that Madara was there and wanted him to leave. Which make sense with how dismissive he was of Double Face during Ephemeral Festival, but I like that Rinne was not and instead acknowledged that Madara is an important part of Kohaku's life...he's just a shit who needs to make up for wronging Kohaku.

gaaaaaaaaaaaaay ♥

And another thing!!!!! It opened with Madara pondering on Nice Arneb Thunder and thinking that him + everything regarding 4piece and his quick acceptance into ES is really sketchy. Which is 1) accurate and 2) hahahaaa I fucking called it, I just knew Madara wouldn't trust this dude!!!!!!!! I said this during the first 4piece tour last year and tbh Madara is one of (the only????) character who hasn't been immediately taken in by Nice's cult of personality charisma. Kohaku also seemed concerned about him after Madara showed up to question Rinne about his past, so like......there's still time for my crack theory to win!!!!! Double Face could still take Nice Arneb Thunder out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sorry not sorry I'm just having a nice time uwu


I ground through the tour quite quickly so I could get Madara's 4* ♥
Honestly, the tour setlist has been really solid so far!!! I just finished up stop 10 and it's been less than 24 hours, which is a lot faster than I've played any recent tours tbh. idk I'm just having a nice time? It's nice to enjoy things ;w;

I mean also Madara is in the event so there's a lot of MaM and Double Face songs, so I am delighted by that ;D

( more enstars-related screencaps in here )

Oh, right. I do have one complaint about the event. Two complaints, I guess? But they're related, so I'll complain about them together. There's no event song and no MV outfits ;w; I know that tours don't usually have either of those, but the year end tours usually do. I guess because it's the prologue to the next chunk of main story it doesn't? BUT I'M STILL FUSSY.

Just another reason to be mad at Nice Arneb Thunder XD

Liz thinks that the outfits are gonna be the 10th anniversary MV outfits that everyone gets, which, like...okay. That's nice and all, but I wanted year end tour outfits ;w;

AT LEAST I HAVE ALTERED AND MY FOUR COPIES OF TSUMUGI


and here's a Lumos for sticking around for this whole longass post!

I should have known Aira would come through for me. I had four copies of his rate up 5* during last year's big end of the year tour, and he definitely showed up this time!!!!!!!!! I had enough dia left to do another 10 scout, and......


TWO MORE COPIES, one right after the other, holy shit I did not expect that!!!!!!
Also I'm up to 2 copies of Rei in engstars and I should be getting a second copy of Eichi today :D Gotta stay on top of it if I wanna max them out~

Also I'm recording a bunch of MVs with Aira's new outfit so I can make more icons of him ♥ I'm just delighted to have him ;w; And the JP game will be down for 4 hours before the event starts, so I gotta prepare!!!


Aira looks like he's the girlfriend of some important yakuza guy (Kohaku) who's supporting his dreams ♥

I GOT MY BOY!!!!!!!!


HE'S SO CUTE AND HIM & KOHAKU ARE HOLDING HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!
My gacha luck has been so good this weekend that I'm like.....When Will My Luck Run Out XD

anyway it's after 2 am and I am wiped good niiiiiiiiiiight~

TODAY WAS SUCH A FUCKING EXPEDITION AND I REALLY WISH IT HADN'T BEEN!!!!!

lays on the ground

The day started with our laundry machine being full of ants, which is fucking great and also I have a whole paranoia thing about my food getting infested/tainted by ants so like. Now they're somewhere else in my home, and that's terrible!

And of fucking course Liz and I had been planning on catching up on laundry today, so we were like...okay. Cool. We can go to a laundromat, do a shit ton, and call it good (for now). But nope!!! It's never that easy!!!!!!!! On the way to the laundromat, literally less than 5 minutes from the house, we got a flat tire in a chunk of road with nowhere to pull over.

COOL COOL COOL

We made it to a gas station, took a bunch of laundry out of the car - you know, because we were on the way to the laundromat, so of course the whole trunk + back of car was full - and Liz got to work trying to put on the spare tire. But the jack for Pat's car is like super fucking finicky, so it was just not working right.

HOWEVER!!! WE WERE SAVED!!!!!!!!!! A friendly bisexual man helped us change the tire while his girlfriend and boyfriend took turns slapping his ass.....because apparently I was in the start of someone else's porno XD Liz paid him back by buying him a pack of cigarettes and a gatorade, and honestly it was just a very nice interaction. City living is great, y'all.

After that, we finally managed to get "lunch" which was...late enough to be dinner......whatever, it was very good!!! And then...laundry daaaaay~~~~


you know I had to bring the boys!!!!
The laundromat had a lounge on the second floor with free wifi, but 1) the chairs were the most uncomfortable things ever and 2) once we really got into the swing of it, there wasn't much time to "relax" or wait. It took awhile, but now we have tons of clean clothes!!!! Our laundry never runs right in the winter due to the plumbing being shit when it's cold, so we were very behind...

And then we rewarded ourselves with bubble tea :D


oshikatsu life ♥
Final step: getting a replacement tire. The initial plan had been to swing by a 24 hour tire place and get a used one for relatively cheap, but that only sorta worked. Pat's car takes a very odd tire size, so they didn't have any used ones D: But this was a process, since they had to look through a ton of tires...only to be met with failure D:

However, all hope was not lost!!!!! They did have a new tire, for a much better price than tires for his care usually run. All in all, it could have been worse, but it still felt like one thing after a-fucking-nother. I swear, I couldn't catch a break today.

Now I just want wanna curl up and either play enstars or crisis core...I'm beat! So I'll leave you with a picture of a tower of tires~

ALTERED IS HERE!!!!!!!

And it started with my phone crashing in the middle of one of the event songs, because apparently it hadn't charged last night? So that sucked XD I managed to get another chance to play it, but it was very stressful and also it made me feel stupid.

After I managed to get that sorted out, we went out for some errands! I accidentally made me and Pat crave &pizza, so we got that for lunch :D And then went to Michaels, because I want to make cute bows to put on the Double Face nuis (thx to some cute ones I saw on twitter the other day).

However, Michaels ended up stressing me out because??? bad brain day?????? fussy they didn't have any active coupons??????????????????? idk I just got really overwhelmed ;w; I did end up getting some cute ribbons and shit, but it was an oddly harrowing experience.

BUT I DID TAKE SOME CUTE PICS OF THE NUIS WHILE WE WERE OUT!!!! Here's one~


saw this tree outside &pizza and I just had to put the boys in it~ they look so cute ;w;
And then I got home and continued to have bad brain times for no fucking reason??? I tried working on crafting but just got frustrated, so I tried working on icons and that also left me frustrated D: So I gave up on being "productive" and played a bunch of Crisis Core, and that helped :D

Also, it gave me something to do while my phone was running a billion autoplay loops of the engstars event XD

IN THE MIDST OF THAT THOUGH!!!! I FINALLY GOT NATSUME TO RANK A!!!! Because I managed to pull his rate up 5*, he's getting fans in basically every song, soooooo it helped push him the last little bit of the way to 75k ♥ So, he's almost forgiven for gacha crimes (betraying me during the Halloween MaM event in jp and cn).


sobs it's been such a long journey...cannot believe I have four different idols to rank A now...
Other than that...I've gotta log into jp and cn even once today...I've been neglecting them in favor of eng, because I've been looking forward to this event for over a year. Also my head hurts ;w;

SCREAMING ROUND TWO!!!!


the way I literally screamed when he showed up, I did not expect his tsundere ass to make an appearance :O
So the Altered scout box went amazingly, lmao. I also got three copies of Tsumugi, because at least he knows how to be prompt and responsible.

uhhhhhhhh the livestream was great, the new character wasn't Kaname BUT he's apparently an assistant to Nice Arneb Thunder, aka sketchy dude extraordinaire. There's now a giant floating blimp above Ensemble Square????? The next bit of plot sounds insane, though I'm not upset. I love ridiculous things; I do love YuGiOh after all XD

OH RIGHT. ANOTHER FUCKING THING.


Madara is one of the cards in the end of year tour because he's a fucking attention hog and I hate him and I want to chew glass about him all the fucking time!!!!!!!!!!!!
There's some sort of magical girl transformation going on with this event/the next bit of plot????? Like. Uh. It's a lot. It's called "Main Story Mega Sphere" which even sounds like some sort of YGO bullshit...

ngl I love it ♥

Also I'm fuckin tired, so this entry is kinda all over the place :T

Liz and I are gonna watch the Element web anime with Alex tonight, because we wanna rewatch it and she hasn't seen it yet. And since Altered is starting tomorrow in engstars, it's well timed :D

HOLD THE PHONE


KANAME TOJOU?????????????????
Okay, look, I knew they were making announcements during the livestream "radio show" today, but I didn't think it was for real gonna be a new character reveal. Like. HELLO??????????? It's after 2 in the fucking morning, I was about to sleep, but now I'm just vibrating with excitement!!!

I KNOW I'M BEING KINDA UNREALISTIC BUT I WANT IT TO BE KANAME SOOOOO FUCKING BADLY, MY DUMB LITTLE IDIOT, I MISS HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sobs

I'm so normal about Kaname Tojou, I swear.

aaaghhhhhhh I just thought it was gonna be the new Switch MV outfits so imagine MY surprise when I saw this!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH I HAVE TO SLEEP SOMEHOW AND THEN WAKE UP IN LIKE 5 HOURS TO SEE WHAT'S GOING DOWN!!!!!!!!!!

So, after swearing off twitter, I ended up making a new account to be my side/enstars account...I just wanna look at pretty fanart okay ;w;


also sometimes it's nice to just lean into loving a character...I like my username, I think sakuraagawa is cute 🌸
ALSO SPEAKING OF KOHAKU!!!!!! He's the 3* in the new cross scout, which means I spent two fucking 10 scouts to get a single copy of his bitch ass. Like. Okay. I could use the rate up for the upcoming event, but I was kinda hoping to get to see who was on the other side of the cross scout first :T

I guess I shoulda known, since it took I think this long to get his last 3* from a box :T


this face is kinda how I was feeling after it took me so long to get him
So like...thx Kohaku XD plz stop being a little bitch, I love you ♥

I'm also just vibrating with excitement over Altered starting this weekend!!!! It felt so impossibly far away when I started playing - the cards weren't even available in the memorial coin shop yet in jp!! - and now it's almost here. It doesn't quite feel real ;w; I've been waiting so long~

not looking forward to Natsume betraying me in the gacha tho that's for sure

Anyway...I'm kinda hungry, so I guess I should do that instead of just fart around on my laptop XD